3AM + ELMO

I'm eating candy for breakfast. Don't judge me.
I don't normally eat candy for breakfast. In fact, I'm kind of getting grossed out right now.

It all began when my kiddo woke me up at, oh, I don't remember what time it was. 1:37AM? 2:49 and 30 seconds AM? And would NOT go back to sleep. I repeat, would NOT go back to sleep. Repeat again.

This might not have been so bad if I hadn't pulled a late nighter and stayed up until midnight (yes, midnight is late for me. Hush).

So, there I am trying to console my crying toddler and I realize she's as hot as a freshly toasted pop tart (which would totally be a slightly better breakfast than candy). At that moment in the wee hours of, let's say, 2:53 and a half AM-ville, I also realize we have no Motrin. No medicine. Hello recall. Hello fever.

Then, she looks up at me, as we're sitting in our living room at 3 something-or-other in the AM playing with toys and whimpers, "Elmo..."
Elmo? At this hour? No, no. It's bedtime.
CRYING.
FEVER.
Elmo it is.

Even though she is only two years old, my kid is in love with Elmo. I have no idea how this came about. I mean, there's Sid the Science Kid, Dinosaur Train, Clifford, Word World, but Elmo is the chosen one.

So I grab our ONLY Elmo's World DVD (remind me to get at LEAST one more. Please and thank you.) and turn it on. The music starts and the crying stops. Elmo does his little song and dance, checks his email, talks to Mr. Noodle - the usual stuff - and my daughter is somewhat happy.

There are three separate episodes on this DVD and I already know them well. We learn all about BIRDS, BUGS and BIKES.

After the first round of BIRDS, BUGS and BIKES ends, I attempt to explain to my daughter that Elmo has gone to bed and she should too. The crying ensues. I put her back in bed and wait.

Now, I'd like to say that I'm a pretty good wait-the-crying-out type of gal, except when there's a fever/sickness involved. Then, I'm a sucker. I cave right in. Done.

A few minutes roll by and she gets louder.
I put her in bed with us. STILL CRYING.
I try to give her something to drink. NO DICE.
I walk around the house with her in my arms. NOT HAVING IT.
I try the ol' change-the-diaper trick. SHE'S ON TO ME.
I.....turn....Elmo back on. QUIET. MOMENTARY HAPPINESS.
BIRDS, BUGS and BIKES.

Shortly thereafter, I made another attempt at putting her back to bed and knew after 10 minutes that it was hopeless.

From 3AM until 7:30AM is was:
BIRDS, BUGS and BIKES
BIRDS, BUGS and BIKES
BIRDS, BUGS and BIKES
BIRGS, BUBS and BIPS
BIRKS, BARGS and BALKS

The good thing about watching Elmo's World 47 and a half times in a row with your kid in the middle of the night is that the child might pick up a little something on the way. At some point, between the viewing hours of 3AM and 7:30AM, she learned the word WHEEL. And the crowd rejoices. Elmo does it again.

So, maybe in celebration of her learning a new word, I decided to eat candy for breakfast. Or maybe it was because I felt deliriously tired and lazy and saw the candy sitting on my counter. Or maybe it's because I'm out of Lucky Charms. That MUST be it.